Eavesdrop

Back then, when people were so trusting as to not even lock their gates, one could easily sneak in, stand under the eaves, and listen to the conversation going on in the room inside. 

Because human nature doesn't change, one can still find plenty of unguarded eaves to stand under and listen in from. At some point in antiquity, such behaviour wasd eclared unwelcome and, therefore, every schoolteacher worth their salt would wag their fingers in one's faces and declare:

Eavesdroppers never hear any good about themselves.

Scout Finch, for one, will heartily disagree with that statement but it's somewhat true that eavesdroppers often get to hear things that are befuddling at best and unpleasant at worst. 

I recount below snippets of conversations I've happened to chance upon. Without the correct context, these conversations can be puzzling. Or, hilarious.


=== Conversation 1 === 
"No, no, no, you don't sort the children. Just fetch them and send them to me. I'll put them on the tree."


=== Conversation 2 === 
"Which part is the most difficult to cut?" 
"The neck." [Pause] "You must press very carefully and cut. A little bit this side or that, and the whole thing becomes useless." 


=== Conversation 3 === 
"Don't forget to kill before you unmount."


=== Conversation 4 ===
Man 1, pointing to a black phone: "Is that a red phone?"
Man 2, on whose desk the phone sits, and who was addressed by Man 1: "No, it's a green one."

=== Conversation 5 === 
"Okay, so do I have to wear something and come?"
"No, no, no need to wear anything. You can come just like that only."

 
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