Conference calls...and Alice

This is what Alice, of the Wonderland fame, has to say about conference calls:

• Have an agenda
  The White Rabbit put on his spectacles. 'Where shall I begin, please your Majesty?' he asked.
  'Begin at the beginning,' the King said gravely, 'and go on till you come to the end: then stop.'


• Stick to the agenda
  'No, no!' said the Queen. 'Sentence first--verdict afterwards.'
  'Stuff and nonsense!' said Alice loudly. 'The idea of having the sentence first!'


• Be specific
  'I do,' Alice hastily replied; 'at least--at least I mean what I say--that's the same thing, you know.'
  'Not the same thing a bit!' said the Hatter. 'You might just as well say that "I see what I eat" is the same thing as "I eat what I see"!'


• Write the Minutes
  The unfortunate little Bill had left off writing on his slate with one finger, as he found it made no mark; but he now hastily began again, using the ink, that was trickling down his face, as long as it lasted.


• Go on mute when you're not speaking
  One of the jurors had a pencil that squeaked. This of course, Alice could not stand, and she went round the court and got behind him, and very soon found an opportunity of taking it away.


• Do not cough or sneeze into the mouthpiece
  Here one of the guinea-pigs cheered, and was immediately suppressed by the officers of the court. (As that is rather a hard word, I will just explain to you how it was done. They had a large canvas bag, which tied up at the mouth with strings: into this they slipped the guinea-pig, head first, and then sat upon it.) `I'm glad I've seen that done,' thought Alice. `I've so often read in the newspapers, at the end of trials, "There was some attempts at applause, which was immediately suppressed by the officers of the court," and I never understood what it meant till now.'
  


• Don't ramble
  'Really, now you ask me,' said Alice, very much confused, 'I don't think--'
  'Then you shouldn't talk,' said the Hatter.


• Recap
  'Oh, I've had such a curious dream!' said Alice, and she told her sister, as well as she could remember them, all these strange Adventures of hers.


• Email the action items, with action item owner-names, to everyone
  'What is the use of a book,' thought Alice 'without pictures or conversation?'